Is Your Secret Hurting You and Others?

I want to recommend a book that my dear friend Aaron Stern just wrote. It's such an interesting topic and I feel it's so needed in Christian circles today if we want to see true healing come to the Body of Christ. Aaron is a scholar and avid reader and researcher. The book is full of wisdom.

It's called What's Your Secret? and you can order it here.

And here is the link to Aaron's blog, one of my favorite blogs I keep up with.

Cloudy People Are Most Beautiful

I love watching the sky, looking at weather radar, looking at the forecast, predicting the forecast. I love it. Husband says I should have been a meteorologist. I say, I AM! So many times we can get so busy that we never look up. The sky is so untouched by man. It's like it is God's canvas everyday that He decides what it will look like.



We moved into our current home 2 years ago. Where we lived the 11 years before we could not see the sunset. Here we see the sun set every night. It captures us. Often one of us will holler for the others to run to the window or outside and look at the sun setting. Sometimes there are colors in it that remind me of Heaven because they are not familiar to me here on earth. When I look at sun sets the only thing I can think of is GOD!

So over the years I've realized something. Sunsets are WAY more beautiful when it is a cloudy day. Have you noticed that? It's true. The patterns of the clouds, the shadows, the reflections, the drama!

This morning I saw the clouds in a way I have never ever witnessed before. It took me and my son Robert back! We just stared in amazement. WOW. The clouds were draping in a way that looked like....well I don't know! I cannot describe it. I took a photo, but they never do the real sky justice (just like watching online church or a video never conveys the Presence of the Holy Spirit the same as if you are there).
This is what our sky looked like this morning!




When I was looking at the beauty of the sky God spoke to my heart that often times the most beauty in life is found in the midst of clouds. In life when we are going through hard times and feel hidden by gloominess and such, the way we respond to the circumstances and to God can be more beautiful than ever. And the scars in our life from past battles fought only paint a more unique and radiant sky for others to be blessed by. It is not in our perfection that others see Christ, but in our weaknesses when we gain our strength from Him.

Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

The older I get the more I dread flying but I still enjoy one part...going above the clouds. Once we went up through dark dreary clouds and once we got above them the sun shone so brightly everyone had to lower their shades. I glanced back down to land and noticed the dreadful looking storm clouds. I just thought that everyone down there is only seeing the bad but up here it is still so beautiful. So I teach my kids that no matter what it looks like to us, when we see life from God's grand perspective above it never changes. He is still the same. He is still shining brightly in our lives, even when the storms of life hide our perfect view. It's then when we have to live by faith...knowing that the SON is still shining even though more difficult to see!


There is a song that is popular on Christian radio right now called Blessings by Laura Story.


We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the achings of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise

It reminds me of the part in Francis Chan's book Crazy Love where he talks about how we pray for protection like it is the greatest thing. But what we should really pray for is for God to use us and our lives so greatly that our protection isn't our greatest concern.

Really, who says that the perfect life is a protected one. Who says that perfection is living a long life? Who says that perfection is complete health without tragedy. The fact of life is that bad things happen. To everyone. One day that will no longer be the case. But tragedy and tears will not be avoided in life by any of us. But who says that has to ruin the day...ruin our lives?? The sunset of our lives can be breathtakingly beautiful if we allow God to take our scars and fears and tragedies and pain and shine through us.

If you look at Jesus or his disciples' lives, did they have it easy? Are we to assume that our lives will be easy and free of pain just because we deserve it as God's children? I don't think comfort is God's best for us. We don't learn until we make mistakes usually. We usually aren't grateful for what we have until it is taken away. We are futile men and God is sovereign and holy and omnipotent. We just have to TRUST that He is working it out for our good....

Romans 8:28
The Message (MSG)
26-28Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

No matter what the Son is always shining. Do you believe that? If we do then we will be thankful in every season of our life.

12 Dear friends, don’t be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. 13 Instead, be very glad—for these trials make you partners with Christ in his suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing his glory when it is revealed to all the world. 1 Peter 4:12-19

Other songs of interest: Bring It On by Steven Curtis Chapman and Praise You In this Storm by Casting Crowns. Love them.

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The Day We Got Our Daughters...

GOTCHA DAY!- February 13, 2011!

Taken from morehopeforus.blogspot.com

Today we get our two Chinese daughters!

Today they will be given to us and tomorrow they will be legally ours! Today is One of the greatest days of my life and the greatest day of the Hook family of five! No one can sleep. I guess it is jet lag but mixed in is the excitement of this day! Phoebe just came to me and said she is so excited she can't sleep and that she wonders if Lily will run to her and hug her or be shy. I just thought of the day we told Phoebe we were adopting. She was seven years old. Robert was three and not old enough to know or care. Johnny was about to be 2. So we told Phoebe by herself in her room one night before bed. We prefaced it by telling her about orphans not having parents and a family. We told her there are millions of children like this all over the world and even in America. As her little tiny expressive face began to understand the horror of an orphan's reality, especially in relation to her own, we proudly told her that we were going to go to China and get one and make them part of our family forever. In a split second response, her precious face squinched up in confusion and she spoke two words I will never forget, "Just one?" Daniel and I laughed and both realized the purity of a child's heart and the simple response that comes from love. Love doesn't reason. Love doesn't weigh pros and cons. Love doesn't consider cost an issue. Love responds. Love moves. Love (if I say is a verb will I make this moment any less sincere! Lol!) Yes, love is a verb! Love has been cheapened to something that doesn't resemble our Father's love. But by looking into the eyes of a child we can still find it in it's purest form. And today, at 11, my little Phoebe still has that pure heart. And we aren't getting "just one!" We are getting two! Two lives forever changed! By LOVE! Adoption amazes me. It's the heart of God! I'm so grateful to be a part of God's plan for Ning Li and Xiao Dan's lives! I 'm honored to be their mamma!

So today at 5:11 am in Beijing as I write this I'm also thankful for my incredible husband that said YES to TWO as well! Who has worked 18 hours a day for months preparing for this trip! And also for carrying whimpering AND crying Johnny thru the entire 2 and a half hour frigid tour of Tienanmen Square today! : ) And Rob in his many words of wisdom just two days back home, woke up early and went to Husband and explained to him, that the reason our adoption took so long was so that we would get Lily! And he's right because if the backlog hadn't occurred we never would've considered special needs first and then we would've not met Lily and gotten to adopt TWO! What a great big little brother he will be for Lily! (He also turned to Husband before take off from Seattle and said, "Dad, I got a good feelin this is gonna be a great 12 hour flight!") And Johnny in his own way is so excited about being here to get Hope and Lily. It's all he's ever known. That one day we'd go get his Chinese sister from China! And his heart is so sweet! Just the other day we were watching Animal Hoarders (hey, we were snowed in for two weeks!) and when Johnny watched a sweet old man's story who had 60 chickens in his house Johnny asked, "Mom, is this in real life?" I said yes. He said, "We need to help that man." I know that's a funny story to tell but Johnny was serious and sad for the man and he felt compassion for him. And you know what? Orphans are in real life. They aren't just a religious TV show on we change the channel on. There are millions of Hopes and Lilys! And compassion moves us to act just like the compassion Jesus had on the crowds of people who followed him. And now we have that living inside of us as believers! And that's how the world sees Jesus! Through us! Christianity just isn't a world religion. Christianity is a verb. Christianity responds! It MOVES! I cannot say it enough. We are so grateful to everyone who loves and supported and gave to us to get us to this day!!!! We could not have done it without you. The cost reached over $55,000 with my trip Last summer included and the high cost to get our whole family here in the middle of Chinese New Year (the most expensive time to travel here!) I do not feel like this is the Hook family adoption. It's OUR adoption! To everyone reading this! You have moved out of compassion to change these girls' lives! And it's about to happen! Can u believe it? Yay!!!! I'm not scared or nervous! I am just READY!!!!! I've dreamed of "Gotcha Day" for years. I've watched perfectly edited YouTube videos of glorious moments when the child was given to the adoptive parents with a tear jerking Steven Curtis Chapman song playing in the background. I've waited so long for OUR moment! But right here right now I couldn't care less about that! Just give them to me!!!! Lol!!!!! I don't care if they scream and cry or run and hide! I am ready to be their mamma! (Of course, adri will be capturing the moment on her iPhone so don't get worried!!! We will take whatever moment we get and share it with y'all!!!)

To be continued.... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so glad i cry everyday...

excerpt from my adoption blog

I usually don't cry very easily. Except when the song "I Can Only Imagine" by Mercy Me comes on (yes, still i gets me, even after the billionth time)....it's hard to catch me crying. But that isn't the case lately. In fact, I cannot hold back the tears these days. I've never been OPPOSED to crying (although it does somewhat annoy me that lots of women are cry babies), it's just that I could separate the emotion or not even be bothered by the emotion. Some people have even called me UNSENTIMENTAL! (lol, it's true, I am unsentimental). But right now my heart is mush. In a good way though.

I always dreamed about the trip to get my adopted Chinese daughter. Would I like the way she smelled? Would she be somewhat attractive? Would I like her instantly? How long would it take for me to FEEL like she was my daughter? How long would it take for me to love her like Phoebe, Rob and Johnny? How different would the love for an adopted child be compared to the love I have for my babies I birthed?

These were questions that I thought...and Daniel and I MAYBE mentioned a bit....but since they all seemed to be a bit negative, it wasn't a hot topic. We just trusted that it would all work out. And in time, we would feel like they were really our daughters.

Well, it has worked out just fine and way ahead of schedule. Because the love I have for them is amazing and overwhelming to me. I love those two little Chinese girls with all my heart. And I am not posting this to boast or draw attention to me in a noble way that I could love an orphan or anything. In fact, I take absolutely no credit and I just wanted to write this because I am in awe of what God has done in me. I always knew He'd give us the grace to do this, and that He would help us love these girls as our OWN. But He has changed my heart. I am not the mother of three children. I am the mother of five. I would do anything for them. All five of them.

When I talk about our adoption and Lily and Hope and how much I love them I often feel like I am looking at myself or not even myself. When someone might say they are excited for me, I just think, yes, I am excited for me too! When someone says how great it is that we are adopting them I think yes! It is so great! When someone says how they are going to have such a great life and they are so blessed to be in our family I think, YES! They are blessed. Cause we will do anything for them. and we are happy together, me and Daniel! I don't take ANY credit for any of this. God began this work in me. He drew me to the idea of adoption. He sent me to China. He put Lily and Hope so deep in me that I could never get them apart from me.

It's a miracle really. Adoption is a miracle. We love our biological kids for many reasons. We carried them, we gave birth to them. They remind us of ourselves, except cuter. We would do anything to reproduce a little miracle that is part of us and our spouse. And I share in all those feelings. Every one of them. But have you ever considered if you could love a child that didn't look or act or smell like you? And did you just think that you could never do that....and you wonder how others can??? Well, I am telling you that the reason I can is because of God. He is our Provider. His Heart is pure and true and for the orphans. And when He calls someone to adopt, He gives them every resource they need. I believe that now. He is for me. He is for Daniel. He is for Lily and He is for Hope. He will help us raise these girls. He will help us love them they way they deserve. He will help us show them the way to eternal life through Him.

I just write in awe of Him. I am nothing but an empty vessel. A crying empty vessel at that. I cry because two of my children are away from me. I haven't seen them in 7 months. It's been too long. I have faith. My faith has been strengthened. I think I passed the test....or at least failed it and retook it. But now I think I got an A plus. I believe. I believe He will complete this work! I believe He will provide the money we need. I believe He will provide the medical care and surgeries. I believe He will help me to be the mother to Hope and Lily that HE would want me to be. I believe I can organize my house for five children. I believe I can cook more to save money and make my own soap like the Duggar lady!!!! Actually, that's not true. I will never make my own soap. Besides Chantel already told me that if I could ever not afford soap she would buy it for me. : )

I am happy and blessed and full of faith! Even if I cry everyday!